Coping with Midlife Stress

By: Mary Kearl

You know the stereotype: an overworked, overstressed balding, middle-aged man wakes up one morning with a midlife crisis and decides to drop his wife of 20 or so years for some hot young trophy.

And maybe he even buys a new sports car, starts hitting the gym and dyes his hair.

Though commonly known, this scenario may not hold true for every 40-something. A recent study suggests that for most people across the globe, midlife really is a downer. A time for soul searching, not action.

The study, "Is Well-being U-Shaped over the Life Cycle?," conducted by Andrew Oswald, Ph.D., an economist working at the University of Warwick, UK, measured for depression, anxiety, mental well-being, happiness and life satisfaction. It found that men and women in their 40s were more likely to be depressed and weren't as happy as other age groups. Plus, data recently released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that the suicide rate among 45-to-54-year-olds increased nearly 20 percent from 1999 to 2004, the latest year studied, at higher increases than nearly every other age group.

Is everyone guaranteed a midlife crisis?
No. Statistics vary, but a majority of middle aged people will not have one. Mental health experts would qualify, however, that what most mid-lifers face is a midlife transition, or a time when people "become very aware of our mortality," explains Ronald Nathan, psychologist and author of the relaxation audio program, 'The FAST Technique for Stress Relief.'

Often people faced with a midlife transition can feel bored or trapped by their current lifestyle, which can leave them feeling restless and looking for something new. This might lead to questioning early life decisions and future life plans, and general confusion about life direction. This phase can begin in mid-to-late 30s and end in mid-to-late 60s, depending on the person. The average transition can span at least five to 10 years, and sometimes as long as 15 years, depending on how disruptive it is, says Nathan.

A midlife crisis, on the other hand, is a period of dramatic self-doubt, often characterized by self-destructive behaviors and decisions including alcohol and drugs abuse, extramarital affairs, extravagant purchases, quitting a job, and ending a marriage, says Eva Stubits, Ph.D.

Next: Turning "Crisis" into Transition

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